Ya think?

Hearing of Brangelina’s latest adoption has got me going off on a tangent. Again!  It was the comment one official made:“Senior officials said Jolie’s adoption had been speded up, partly due to her celebrity status.”May have? May have been sped up due to her celebrity status? Of course it was!! She only filed for adoption in early March. So in less than a month her adoption had gone through and she has her little boy Pax Thien.Now don’t get me wrong I think Angelina is a great mother and I think she truly loves her kids and good on her that she has the ability and resources to complete her family this way. But COME ON! What’s good for one should be good for another. I bet I could not fly in to

Vietnam and adopt in less than 4 weeks.In the quick adoptions defence is it not better for an adoption to take place sooner rather than later? All studies about the Institutionalized Child prove that they Benefit from Early Intervention.  The transition into your family for an institutionalised child can be very difficult.In

China for example a child can be abandoned with in days of birth and still not be paper ready to adopt for at least 3 months. This I understand. There is a process of advertising the abandoned child in newspapers around the country for a period of no less than 3 months. When that child is not claimed (a sad unbelievable fact), that child is legally available for adoption. Now this is where I have the problem. Why take a 3 month old baby and place them in an orphanage or with a foster family when they are clearly ready to be adopted into a permanent family. Chinese children are usually never adopted until after at least 9 months of age but usually around the 19-24 month age. How traumatic for a small child to be ripped out of the only home they have ever known and be handed over to complete strangers. Yes I agree that a 3 month old baby would also know the difference but the transition for a 3 month old would have to be far better than that of a 22 month old toddler who knows her Aiyi by smell and sight and is bonded to her.From all the couples I know who have returned from

China with their ‘toddlers’ the experience of being handed their child for the first time is agonising and distressing in the extreme. These little children either go into shock becoming quiet and distant or they kick, scream and punch to get away from their new parents and return to their carers. I can not see how this event can be in the ‘best’ interest of the child.Through this whole process of adoption we have been told constantly over and over by our agency, “This adoption is not about you, this adoption is not about making you feel whole or complete. This adoption is about the child and what is best for the child.”Tell me how traumatising a little one is in their best interest?Now I know there are so many other adoption scenarios that don’t fall into this category. There are for example families who choose to adopt older children or siblings specifically.But when it comes to young couples who specifically ask to adopt a baby why can’t these young, barely institutionalised babies be the ones referred?  No child should have to know about life inside the walls of an orphanage without Mum or Dad, but if they do should it not be for the shortest period of time possible?See I told you that reading about Angelina sent me off on a tangent.  

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