I will follow you into the dark

Below are the lyrics to “I will Follow you into the Dark” by Deathcab for Cutie.


Love of mine
Someday you will die
But I’ll be close behind
I’ll follow you into the dark
No blinding lights or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of the spark

If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no’s on their vacancy signs
If there’s no one beside you when your soul embarks
Then I’ll follow you into the dark

In catholic school, as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me “Son fear is the heart of love”
So I never went back

If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no’s on their vacancy signs
If there’s no one beside you when your soul embarks
Then I’ll follow you into the dark

You and me
Have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes
Are all worn down, the time for sleep is now
But it’s nothing to cry about cause we’ll hold each other soon
In the blackest of rooms

If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no’s on their vacancy signs
If there’s no one beside you when your soul embarks
Then I’ll follow you into the dark
I’ll follow you into the dark.

A beautiful song to listen to but what does it actually mean? What is he saying? He does not think they will enter either heaven or hell? The video clip even opens up more questions.

Would love your feedback on this.


“A person’s a person no matter how small . . .”

“A person’s a person no matter how small . . .”

—Dr. Seuss, Horton Hears a Who



Feeling so sad this morning.


Just heard from Meg that her and Dj have lost the baby.

Baby K was 7 weeks along in his life journey. Baby K’s would already have been 10mm long with a fully developed appendix and pancreas. Baby K’s arms and legs would have been growing longer (much longer if they took after Dj!) and their heart would have already halved into right and left chambers. Even their little nose would have been growing this week.


But the Lord saw fit to take this little bub home to Himself. It’s hard to handle or understand but He knows best. I was looking for spiritual comfort this morning and these verses came to me 2 Cor. 1:3-4. I really hope I can be used of God to comfort Meg and DJ the way they need to be comforted.

And hard as it is we are not meant to know or understand everything now. 1 Corinthians 13:12; 1 John 3:2.


And we know that we will see Baby K again 2 Samuel 12:19-23 Just as David was sure he would see his son again we know we will see Baby K.

Greg would know the workings of this better than us right now and I take comfort in that.

How jaded are you?

A very dear friend of mine had just told me last week that she and her husband are 6 weeks pregnant.

Albert and I were overjoyed for them; it was such exciting news and was a wonderful opportunity to explain to Lily how a baby grows in her Mummy’s tummy.


Lily seemed to grasp the idea that a baby was growing in Meg’s tummy and made sure she mentioned it at least 100 times last week.

She kept patting her tummy and saying “Megs baby in tummy, Megs baby.”


Then this past Sunday we were told that Meg had started bleeding and that the baby was in jeopardy. So I told Lily that Aunty Megs baby was ‘sore’ (this is a word she understands for whether you are ill, hurt, sick etc). I told her that we needed to pray for Aunty Meg and Uncle Dj that their baby would keep growing safe in Aunty Megs tummy. She looked at me with big solemn eyes and said “ok”. Then promptly ran off to play.

I thought ok she really hasn’t got what I am saying so I will leave it there.

A little later I sat down to take a break from all the ironing I was doing and Lily came and sat with me.

She looked up at me and pointed to her eyes as she scrunched them shut, saying “Lily pray”

I told her “ok you pray”

She put one little hand in the air and began to pray “Dear Dod (the rest of the words I could not make out) Amen!”

She then looked up at me and smiled and said “Megs baby better now”.


Wow!! The faith of a child is so very precious. Mark 11:22-23  If only you could bottle it and apply it daily.  Why do we lose that perspective as we get older? Why do we become jaded?


Please continue to pray for Meg and Dj (pictured below with our precious pumpkin) as there is still a 50% percent chance that they will keep the baby. A precious little person, already at 6 weeks who I am so wanting to meet.

Dj, Lily and Meg

Well here we go again…



On Monday (16/06/08) Albert, Lily and I had a second timer’s interview at Docs to start the process of adoption all over again.

We are very excited as a family and Lily is already talking about her Didi (Younger brother).

We have submitted our application to adopt a baby boy from Taiwan.


We had known even before Lily came home that we wanted more than one child. But the whole time I was thinking of Lily and waiting for her to come home I wondered if my excitement and anticipation was only because Lily was our first.

Yet here I sit completely content with motherhood and being mother to Lily the amazing and I am just as excited. I am going to have two children. A girl and a boy.


Could anyone be more satisfied than me?


I think not!


Signing off as: MRS QUIETLY JOYFUL: today….

Lily Lou

On a very wet and cold 8th of June 2007 we flew into Sydney from Shanghai with the most precious gift.

A baby girl named Lily Chun Xing. She was 16th months old.

I was still in a state of disbelief that the Chinese military police at the departure gate in Shanghai actually let us leave with Lily.


Our friend Matt picked us up Sydney International and drove us home. What an amazing moment that was when we saw Matt.

Our new life as parents had just collided with our old life and friends. It made it real at that moment. We were no longer in this limbo land of strangeness.

We were home AND we were still parents.


In the last 12 months Lily has grown and developed in so many ways that I am just amazed at the resiliency of children. She is such a clever, witty little personality.

I am still madly in love with her. She is the most beautiful child I have ever seen (in my humble opinion J) I still lay in bed at night looking at her sleeping and am just amazed that we were allowed the most precious opportunity of adoption.

It is also never far from my mind that Lily’s bio family will never have the opportunity we have to watch this amazing girl grow in to an amazing adult.

We may never know Lily’s birth story and the reasons she was relinquished but it leaves a hollow sadness in me, so I can only imagine what feelings Lily may have as she grows and starts to question her birth story and history.


I love being the mother of an adopted child and I can’t imagine why you would not want to adopt a child. It’s the most amazing journey. I am still thankful every minute for the opportunity I was given to be a Mum.


Love you with all my heart Lily Lou!!